On Tuesday I had my first go around on the "other" side of the parent/teacher conference table. I was actually pretty nervous going in there and I couldn't pinpoint why. Owen's teacher had lots of nice things to say about him and gave him plenty of positive feedback. The majority of the "grades" on his progress report were "S"s, but there were a few "N"s.
For whatever reason, I felt really let down that he hadn't done better. I felt as though *I* had failed in some way. The areas where Owen received "N"s weren't areas that surprised me. They are areas were he'd receive an "N" at home too! I spent most of the day thinking about it, and I eventually realized that, A: To "need improvement" is not necessarily a bad thing. It's good to recognize areas where we could improve and strive to be better. B: This is preschool. He is three. This is NOT that big of a deal. (Matthew helped me figure that one out!)
In the end what I realized was really bothering me was the fact that a parent of one of my students once told me, "You don't understand what it's like to have to hear these things about your child."
I scoffed. It clearly wasn't *me* that didn't understand. They were the ones who didn't understand! What was so difficult to understand about your kid not being perfect. No one is. Why was that so hard to hear??
Now I get it. You spend the years leading up to school hearing from all of the other adults in your child's life how perfect they are. (Think: Grandma!) As a parent you know that they're not perfect... Of course they're not, but still somewhere deep inside, you appreciate hearing from everyone else what a perfect little angel your child is. Suddenly, they're in school and lo-and-behold the teacher tells you that your little angel is indeed NOT perfect... In fact, they "Need to improve"! Ouch.
Now I get it.
It was one of those moments of Karmic retribution for me. :)
In other news, we've been fighting off sickness. I started the week not feeling the best, then Owen started vomiting (FUN!), and Matthew is also not feeling too great. Hopefully we'll be able to kick whatever is plaguing us quickly!
Final Funny Story...
We were sitting around the dinner table the other night and Matthew asked Owen what he had done that day. Owen replied, "Played with the chickens". Matthew asked, "What did you play with the chickens? Baseball? Cars? Did you take them fishing?"
Owen looked at him and said, "Daddy, you can't take chickens fishing! They don't have any hands to hold the pole!"
His voice and face as he explained this fact to his dad were priceless. He couldn't believe that his daddy would not know such a simple thing!
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Stephanie,
ReplyDeleteI am right there with you when it comes to grades. I started reading "The Blessing of a Skinned Knee" It is a parenting book through the ways of Jewish beliefs. No I am not converting, but this book makes a lot of sense.
I hope you all are over your sickness by now. We are all on our way to recovery. Craig has not got it yet so I hope it means he wont. We missed Luke and Andrea's wedding too. Hope this week is better than last for all!